Welcome to The Morning After, where I share with you what movies I’ve seen over the past week. Below, you will find short reviews of those movies along with a star rating. Full length reviews may come at a later date.

So, here is what I watched this past week:

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales

A film franchise is only as good as the writers behind it. The Pirates of the Caribbean films have been producing box office success for 14 years now, but in its fifth outing, things have gotten dire indeed.

Rooted in reality, but bred for excess, Pirates of the Caribbean has been mining the tales of the sea for so long that few adventures still seem feasibly. In doing so, Disney has latched onto their cash cow with unerring interest. Six years after its prior incarnation, the breathing room has allowed us to see how tired and miserable the series is. Featuring a smattering of the original cast, we’re now trapped with unfamiliar directors and actors trying to make everything seem like it’s hunky dory.

With a handful of promising action sequences on display, the film drags these production numbers out excessively. They overstay their welcome, much like the characters in the film. At one point, Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) was the kind of character whose loutish ways were a veneer over the heart of a lover of life. Now, he can hardly be seen as more than a selfish, inconsiderate oaf whose skill has seldom saved the day and whose fate is intricately tied to how smart the people around him are. He’s no longer a hero and he’s certainly no antihero. At the point your protagonist shifts from being respected to being dismissed, it’s time to hang up the tricorne hat.